Shifting Realities

I got into a (great) program! Yippee!!! I am still waiting on hearing back from another school. Both programs are on the east coast though, so it is safe to say that I will be moving to the east coast sometime this summer!

Since hearing in mid-December that I didn't get into UCSF I've been working on so many back-up plans. Even back-up plans of back-up plans. And I've been acting as though I wouldn't get in anywhere (to keep my expectations low). Which means I've been trying to set it up so that I can apply to as many schools as possible and make myself as valued as possible. That means taking many random, school-specific requirements and trying to volunteer a lot. So after hearing the news that I got in this morning, and after being all happy about that, I have spent a lot of time thinking about the next few months and how they're actually going to be. There are many things I don't have to do now. And there are many things I have to do now (like figure out how I'm gonna pay for it all !)

It's strange. My whole reality is kind of shifting. But I'm not complaining.

This is a good day.

Dusty Memories

I mentioned in my post from yesterday that I lowered my bed recently. My bed has been on riser-things for almost 4 years now. In both my current apartment and my last one, this helped give much-needed storage space. Last weekend I decided I didn't want my bed up high any more. I really couldn't tell you why I decided this, but I lowered my bed on Tuesday night and it feels right.

The funny thing is that under-the-bed, at least for me, has been for all those things you can't bear to get rid of but that you don't really need. The process of lowering the bed meant taking everything out, sorting through it, packing some of it away, throwing some of it away, and getting reacquainted with all that had been forgotten. A lot of dust and a lot of memories were stirred up, and I've had strange dreams every night since about meaningful people from my past. Remembering these people has made me miss them. The dreams don't help.

And all this makes me wonder about sleeping over things. How does that affect feng shui? Do pieces of the forgotten seep in during those hours of the morning when your quite mind is empty? Does it somehow add to the sleeping experience, in the sense that you are surrounded by the stuff that has helped shape your life and who you are?

I'm not sure. But to B, G and F--I miss you and our memories. I am glad I remember.

The Year of the Bartender

I haven't really been in the mood to write or read blogs lately. Part of that is because things have been crazy and I've been running around a lot (thus, not regularly at a computer). Even work has been crazy. Since work is normally the time that I do things like email, blog, plan future travels, etc., actually working during the day means I've had a less time for all those non-essential time-sucks. That doesn't mean I haven't thought about posting though.

So this is the 18th day into 2007. Here are some statistics from this year (and my experience of it) so far:

Since 2006, I have liked, flirted with and/or given my number to three separate bartenders. Nothing came of it. Good thing I'm a wizened 28 year-old. I didn't expect anything. (Well, technically, the jury is still out on one of them. I may see him tomorrow night.) Nevertheless, this bartender-in-07 thing began on New Years, and therefore 2007 is the officially the Year of the Bartender. Pour moi.

Since 2006, I have asked out one movie star. My Big Damn Hero. He never read the email in which I asked him out. Again, I expected nothing so I don't feel sad.

Since 2006, I have read one book, Lamb, about Jesus' best friend Biff. It was funny and good! Thanks CH and Y for suggesting!

Since 2006 (remember, 18 days ago) I have worked out thirteen times. This year is gonna be full of healthy living! So far, so good. My initial observations included a more constant hunger, which led me into a crazed state of snacking, along with extreme fatigue. Fortunately the stress kept me from sleeping. Which made me a little delirious earlier this week. Now I am less hungry, less tired, less stressed, and (hopefully) less heavy.

Since 2006, I have uncovered a new obsession. This new obsession is Battlestar Galactica (BSG), and watching it has improved my life (thanks Napper). Between January 1 and January 17, I watched seasons 1, 2, and the first half of 3. That's 44 episodes and one 4-hour mini-series. It has made all other TV shows less interesting for me. I love Love LOVE this show because the sub-plots and story arcs are so perfectly multilayered and complex. The characters feel like real people, torn between doing what is right and what is easy, and they are all tangled up in emotions and motives and questions about what makes us human. And, oh yeah, they're doing all this while struggling to survive.

Since 2006, two new traditions (among my friends and I) have sprung up and been adhered to:

a) Weekend Warm-Up: KA and I decided to be more social during the week. Last Thursday night we went to a great lounge in MB. It was lots of fun!

b) Sunday Night Dinner: Some of my friends and I thought a bi-weekly dinner at someone's house with home-cooked food would be fun. 'Cause we're old now and that's what old people do. Last weekend we had our first SND. A whole group of us hung out and ate yummy panini. It was nice and I look forward to future evenings.

Since 2006, I have been on jury duty (there was a HOT judge! I wanted to help him keep the bench warm), been on two unfruitful match.com dates (nothing good to report), re-calculated new school-career-path plans countless times, applied to two new nursing programs, written five essays about why I'm wonderful and every nursing school should take me, celebrated Hbo’s birthday, started the spring semester (taking three classes this time), started the process to volunteer in an ER, received a TB test, did major clean-up in my room, lowered my bed (it was up on riser things to give more under-bed storage), and...well, I guess that's all.

Now only 347 days left.

Tomorrow BFF KM comes to town. We're going to get our groove on to 80's music saturday night. If only I could find my LA Gear acid wash jean skirt and pink members only jacket...

His Love is True

My Big Damn Hero posted this on his blog today:

"Cheers to all the folks who send great letters, just connecting, being cool and enjoying the access that the web provides. I really appreciate your stories and energy. Jeers to the 'I know you'll never respond to me, but you really should talk more to the fans, you know. It would be nice, you know' guilt trips. What do you know about how much I respond to letters? You just bought yourself a ticket to Ignoresville, USA with your negativity. How do you like me now?"

Ha ha. That means he doesn't respond to a lot of people.

My (Cute!) Big Damn Hero*

I have a big crush on Nathan Fillion. He played the Captain in Serenity and Firefly, For the non Sci-Fi geeks, he was also in that sitcom Two Guys and a Girl (he was one of the guys). I like him because he's funny and quirky and sarcastic. And...he's super cute.

Mr. Fillion is a friend of mine on MySpace. And I email him, periodically, just to tell him his blogs are funny, or to wish him a happy boxing day (he's Canadian). I email, as opposed to comment, because all 9000 of his other friends leave comments. I'm not sure how many emails he gets but I always know he reads mine (MySpace email lets you know when the recipient has read your email). And so email has been my communication method of choice for he and I.

For the heck of it, on Friday night, I sent him this email:

I didn't expect a response. I just did it because.

I was shocked, nay SHOCKED, on Saturday morning when I woke up to this comment from him:











He could have responded to my email by hitting reply, but instead he clicked on my page, scrolled down through pictures of my family and friends, and left a comment declaring publicly that he thought I was cute.

This has sort of made my year. Seriously.

He's single and lives in LA. Maybe I'll ask him out on a date. (I am only 51% serious about this, by the way).

*Big Damn Hero is a reference to a scene/conversation in Firefly.

The Middle-Aged Frog

As part of my New Years Resolution to be healthier this year, I am committing to working out five times a week. Three of those workouts have to be "bigger" ones. Meaning, they have to be for about an hour and they must include some weight training. Or they can be a long run. The other two workouts only need to be 20-30 min and their only requirement is that they get my heart-rate up. It can be walking, jogging, lunges, squats, or aerobics.

So far, my plan has worked and today was my 5th workout of the week. The only problems I have encountered are the following: 1) I am tired! If I'm sitting down and watching TV at night, I start getting very sleepy around 7 PM. 2) I am hungrier and want to snack constantly. But snacking all the time sort defeats the purpose. Fortunately, my "be more healthy" New Years Resolution also encourages things like sleeping more and eating healthier food. So getting tired early and snacking on healthier items are not such bad things.

This morning it was very hard to get up. And it didn't help that the wind last night was so bad. It kept waking me up, and thoughts of "should I bring the plants in from the patio? Will they be blown away?" didn't help. When the alarm clock went off this morning, I was tired and hit the snooze button. When it went off again, I did my typical morning-exercise bargaining: "Can I workout some other time today instead? Do I REALLY have to work out today at all? I've done so good this week. And it's so windy...and cold. Maybe it will rain. It wouldn't be good to run in a tempest. Not on a Friday. And I'm going to Disneyland tonight! That means lots of walking. That's aerobic, right?" But all that was crap and the only concession I allowed for was that I could workout indoors instead. After all, the commitment today was only to do 20-30 min of cardio.

Since variety is essential in me keeping up my 5X commitment, I recorded some 30 min exercise shows earlier this week from various cable channels. This morning I couldn't help but laugh at myself as I did interval training with Denise Austin from her show on the Lifetime network. It was a pretty good workout! I got sweaty and we used weights and did some hip and thigh stuff too. But I felt so middle-aged.

A Florescent-Bright Future

So things are looking up re: my future.

I have found several more programs I can apply to. While none of them are quite as perfect as UCSF, many are great and will work just fine (should I get in). I have completed one application and am working on another due on January 15th. Then I will apply to many more in the coming year. Since these programs are all accelerated ones geared towards getting students a second bachelors degree or a bachelors/masters combo deal, they all start at different times of the year and go year-round. Therefore, I am working on a big matrix of all the programs I want to apply to, when their deadlines are, what courses are required, etc.

This is a lot of work (sigh).

Other good news: I just got a volunteer position at an ER in downtown LA! Well kind of. The head of ER nursing is a friend of a friend and she called just now. She wants me to come in next week, fill out my paper work, get a TB test and then start. She said the hours are up to me so it sounds like it's pretty much a sure thing.

I envision helping out a cute doctor while he skillfully tends to gunshot wounds. Just kidding. Well, I'm only kidding a little bit. I'm sure there will actually be gunshot wounds to tend to. And I do love me some cute doctor. But I know that the fantasies in my head are way more glamorous than the reality of it all. And even if there is a cute doctor, I might not notice. No one looks good under florescent light.

One more thing. People have been asking about the hotel in Ensenada, so here's a picture of the of the pool/deck area. Every room had an ocean view looking out over this: