The Way Things Go
On Saturday night I met a boy. We had a lovely time together. But at the end of it he didn't ask me for my number. We have mutual friends, so I have decided to believe that he didn't ask because it is likely we will see each other again. It's possible.
But the adult in me thinks that if he were really into me, he would have asked for my number. I know that if I really liked someone I would ask for theirs. But I also know that's the way I think. And I know enough to know that while my thoughts on dating etiquette seem logical and obvious TO ME, maybe they aren't.
So I've come to these two conclusions about why I cannot compare a guy's actual actions to the way I think he should act: 1) I am not a guy, and 2) I will never understand how guys think.
In some strange "dating-is-a-game" universe, having a guy ask for your number is like getting a point in that particular match. And as much as we all say there is no game, there is always some type of game. And everyone wants to win. So I was sad when Saturday Night Boy did not ask for my number. Part of me feels like he should have. Just out of courtesy. So that I get my little point and feel somewhat satisfied for a game well played.
But I know more now about the way things go and I realized something today: I would rather a guy not ask for my number than think "Is that him?" each time the phone rings for days after the encounter. Not wondering if he's gonna call is much, much more valuable than that brief post-rendez-vous number-exchange victory.
It might be one point for a phone number, but I'm only going for three-pointers now.
But the adult in me thinks that if he were really into me, he would have asked for my number. I know that if I really liked someone I would ask for theirs. But I also know that's the way I think. And I know enough to know that while my thoughts on dating etiquette seem logical and obvious TO ME, maybe they aren't.
So I've come to these two conclusions about why I cannot compare a guy's actual actions to the way I think he should act: 1) I am not a guy, and 2) I will never understand how guys think.
In some strange "dating-is-a-game" universe, having a guy ask for your number is like getting a point in that particular match. And as much as we all say there is no game, there is always some type of game. And everyone wants to win. So I was sad when Saturday Night Boy did not ask for my number. Part of me feels like he should have. Just out of courtesy. So that I get my little point and feel somewhat satisfied for a game well played.
But I know more now about the way things go and I realized something today: I would rather a guy not ask for my number than think "Is that him?" each time the phone rings for days after the encounter. Not wondering if he's gonna call is much, much more valuable than that brief post-rendez-vous number-exchange victory.
It might be one point for a phone number, but I'm only going for three-pointers now.
posted by Follow the Frog at 6:08 PM
1 Comments:
Oh, I TOTALLY agree. There is nothing worse than waiting for the phone to ring. I'm beginning to think that if a guy asks for your number, it's infinitely better to just get his. Then the ball's in your court. Let him wait by the phone! =)
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