Calling My Old Boss a Ho
So twice in the past week I have been woken by a phone call during the 3am hour. Last week it was an unidentified call and last night, as best as I can tell, it was an international call originating from Unit Arab Emirates. At least, that's what the country code and the phone number suggests. I really don't care if I'm getting random crank calls, but I do care that they come at 3am and wake me up. Each time, I'm deep in sleep and very disoriented. My cell phone ring is the Sex and the City Theme song, and it takes a complete round of the entire song before I realize what is happening, where I am, where my phone is, and why it might be making noise. Very odd.
Since we're talking about cell phones, I have another cell phone story to share. This one is a little embarrassing. Sometimes, my BD and I talk to each other like rappers. That is, we employ the insightful and emotionally charged lingo of such stars like 50 Cent, Ludicrous, and Juvenile. One of my favorites is to greet her with a "What it is ho?" from the very crude "Some Cut" by Trivelle and Cutty. For those of you unfamiliar with the song, that is pretty much the only radio-friendly line in the whole thing. The rest of the song is set to a background of repeated and rhythmic bed squeaking noises. Possibly to simulate what a bed might sound like during certain horizontal activities. That may give you a good idea about the song's topic. But I digress. On Saturday, I had lunch with KM and SK. It was the day of the bash and I wanted to text message my BD a quick hello. I typed in "what it is ho" and carefully navigated to the contacts screen. I send a lot of text messages and feel that I'm somewhat of an expert in this area. My pride may have been a little excessive though, because in my haste to send this important message, I accidentally sent it to my old boss (A)!
I sent A a message saying "What it is, ho?"
I can't believe that.
I've had lots of bosses here at the Death Star and A is the least fun and least laid-back. He was born and raised in the Middle East too, so he probably doesn't "get" the whole rap thing or the endearing quality behind the term "ho." Luckily, nothing has been brought up about it.
And on the topic of slightly embarrassing interactions...I was driving back to the office after lunch today and I pulled into the left hand turn lane. I was waiting and waiting behind a maintenance van. Two lights later, I realized the van was doing doing gardening while parked in the left hand turn lane, which meant he wasn't actually turning. There were cones set up behind the van and he had his emergency flashers on, but I guess I just didn't notice these tell-tale signs of "maintenance." Anyways, I had to signal to the car behind me to back up, then I had to reverse far enough back so that I could pull out away from all the orange cones. Of course I was doing all this while traffic kept on speeding by around me. I ended up pulling out in front of someone who was kind enough to slow down and then drove over a cone. Suave, huh? Then when I pulled back into the left hand turn lane (in front of the van this time), the car I had cut off pulled behind me and honked. It was my WBF! Of all the people to notice me backing out of a stupid situation and then running over a cone, it had to be him. I felt like Anne of Green Gables. She always ran into Gilbert Blithe while doing stupid things.
Oh well. At least he honked and waved.
Since we're talking about cell phones, I have another cell phone story to share. This one is a little embarrassing. Sometimes, my BD and I talk to each other like rappers. That is, we employ the insightful and emotionally charged lingo of such stars like 50 Cent, Ludicrous, and Juvenile. One of my favorites is to greet her with a "What it is ho?" from the very crude "Some Cut" by Trivelle and Cutty. For those of you unfamiliar with the song, that is pretty much the only radio-friendly line in the whole thing. The rest of the song is set to a background of repeated and rhythmic bed squeaking noises. Possibly to simulate what a bed might sound like during certain horizontal activities. That may give you a good idea about the song's topic. But I digress. On Saturday, I had lunch with KM and SK. It was the day of the bash and I wanted to text message my BD a quick hello. I typed in "what it is ho" and carefully navigated to the contacts screen. I send a lot of text messages and feel that I'm somewhat of an expert in this area. My pride may have been a little excessive though, because in my haste to send this important message, I accidentally sent it to my old boss (A)!
I sent A a message saying "What it is, ho?"
I can't believe that.
I've had lots of bosses here at the Death Star and A is the least fun and least laid-back. He was born and raised in the Middle East too, so he probably doesn't "get" the whole rap thing or the endearing quality behind the term "ho." Luckily, nothing has been brought up about it.
And on the topic of slightly embarrassing interactions...I was driving back to the office after lunch today and I pulled into the left hand turn lane. I was waiting and waiting behind a maintenance van. Two lights later, I realized the van was doing doing gardening while parked in the left hand turn lane, which meant he wasn't actually turning. There were cones set up behind the van and he had his emergency flashers on, but I guess I just didn't notice these tell-tale signs of "maintenance." Anyways, I had to signal to the car behind me to back up, then I had to reverse far enough back so that I could pull out away from all the orange cones. Of course I was doing all this while traffic kept on speeding by around me. I ended up pulling out in front of someone who was kind enough to slow down and then drove over a cone. Suave, huh? Then when I pulled back into the left hand turn lane (in front of the van this time), the car I had cut off pulled behind me and honked. It was my WBF! Of all the people to notice me backing out of a stupid situation and then running over a cone, it had to be him. I felt like Anne of Green Gables. She always ran into Gilbert Blithe while doing stupid things.
Oh well. At least he honked and waved.
posted by Follow the Frog at 2:08 PM
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