Flirting for 10 Year Olds
So in light of the Saturday evening events, I spent all day yesterday obsessing about my WBF. What did it all mean? Did our conversation happen only in my head? What if he doesn't remember it? What if he does like me but only in a hooking up kind of way? What if he can tell that I have a crush on him? Why do I think that would be bad?How will this effect working with him??
To make matters worse, today is his birthday. I told him I had a gift for him on Saturday (which is true), but that meant I was forced to see him today. Normally that is a good thing, but now I'm starting to get freaked out about all of this. I still like him and want him to like me, but I am unsure of everything. I wrapped his present yesterday and included a slightly flirty message, but today I wanted to drop it off at his desk when he wasn't around. I was so anxious to give it to him though that I was forced to pass it on while he was there. I was so terribly awkward and shy, I practically threw the box at him and scurried away with my head down.
He came by my desk later to thank me. I knew he would do this, and I was partially looking forward to such a visit (because I wanted him to see my sexy-in-a-work-way outfit), but also nervous because...well, I'm not sure why. Maybe because I'm making such a big deal out of all this in my head or maybe because until this weekend, anything actually happening with him seemed so unlikely. And now that it's starting to become more of a potential reality, I am appropriately reverting to a 10 year old girl.
Maybe I am afraid because I just finished watching the Real World Las Vegas and the whole Steven-Trichelle situation makes me so sad. It's presuming a lot to think that that situation could even be applied here, but it does seem like a possibility and that is not what I want.
Obviously, the best, most-grown up behavior going forward is intermittent bouts of flirtiness followed by spells of avoidance. That way I will confuse him so much about what I want that nothing ever happens, and then I am saved from any heart-break.
I think he really liked what I got him for his birthday though, which is good...
To make matters worse, today is his birthday. I told him I had a gift for him on Saturday (which is true), but that meant I was forced to see him today. Normally that is a good thing, but now I'm starting to get freaked out about all of this. I still like him and want him to like me, but I am unsure of everything. I wrapped his present yesterday and included a slightly flirty message, but today I wanted to drop it off at his desk when he wasn't around. I was so anxious to give it to him though that I was forced to pass it on while he was there. I was so terribly awkward and shy, I practically threw the box at him and scurried away with my head down.
He came by my desk later to thank me. I knew he would do this, and I was partially looking forward to such a visit (because I wanted him to see my sexy-in-a-work-way outfit), but also nervous because...well, I'm not sure why. Maybe because I'm making such a big deal out of all this in my head or maybe because until this weekend, anything actually happening with him seemed so unlikely. And now that it's starting to become more of a potential reality, I am appropriately reverting to a 10 year old girl.
Maybe I am afraid because I just finished watching the Real World Las Vegas and the whole Steven-Trichelle situation makes me so sad. It's presuming a lot to think that that situation could even be applied here, but it does seem like a possibility and that is not what I want.
Obviously, the best, most-grown up behavior going forward is intermittent bouts of flirtiness followed by spells of avoidance. That way I will confuse him so much about what I want that nothing ever happens, and then I am saved from any heart-break.
I think he really liked what I got him for his birthday though, which is good...
posted by Follow the Frog at 12:00 PM
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